What ever is my subconscious telling me?

I have been having a bunch of weird dreams lately. INCREDIBLY weird dreams. Here are a few of them:

Last night I dreamed I was a senior in High School, I was 6 months pregnant (Of course it was going to be a girl) and I had NO recollection of how it happened (the best I could figure I was date raped, yes even in my dreams I think about those disturbing things, even though I have never put myself in a situation to let that happen).

The dream started with me in the car, crying again because no one believed me that I did not know how I got pregnant or by whom. I was headed to the High School for my last day, which was at the end of 1st term in Jan., I was graduating early. Another girl I knew in high school was also in the office (I was checking in for an appt. with the school counselor). I was never really friends with this girl but, we were friendly toward one another. I hadn't seen her in some time. She was 8 months pregnant with a boy.

So I went into the counselor office, and it was a new person, one who was my elementary school counselor and who I adored as a kid. He really tried to help my family out. Like everyone else in my life, he was disappointed in me. I told him what I believed had happened. I also told him that I was allowing my Uncle and his wife to adopt this baby. Then I wold go to college in the fall.
A few minutes later I went to my last day of history class. This girl walks in and grabs my hand. She looks at the teacher and says "one of her siblings died, her father is waiting to tell her which one." I, of course, was historical. And immediately I began to cramp in my stomach. The girl took me to a conference room where My Dad and Little Sister sat. Where my MOm was I did not know. I looked at my sister and new immediately it was my little brother. I started screaming. Partly because of the death, and because I had serious pain in my abdomen. My Dad tried to tell me what happened, from what I "heard" he was in some sort of car accident. I was so angry, I was screaming at my sister that she was the one who deserved to die, not him (long story their, I kind of know why I dreamed that....). then all the sudden I realized the cramping in my stomach was related to the baby, and I thought I was loosing her.....and of course, I "blacked out" and woke up from this nightmare....


About a week ago I had another, not so sad but incredibly weird dream. I was going to be a surrogate mom (don't know who for though). Alex use to have this really nice physical therapist who recently moved. I got to know her a bit and I really liked her. In my dream, she was the doctor, and she was doing the procedure to "impregnate me". Aside from WHO was doing this procedure, where it was taking place was completely bizarre. She had a big 5 gallon bucket of "stuff" ( I suppose it was the fertilized eggs), and this gigantic syringe. with, seriously, like a 10 inch needle. She filled it with the stuff, and began to insert 5 syringes full into my stomach (and to my uterus). I could actually feel the pain of each need stick. Now, looking back into my dream, I know that I probably was feeling some sort of pain in my body, probably due to positioning. Since you are technically paralyzed during this state of sleep, I wouldn't have been able to move myself to make my body more comfortable so instead, I dreamed about something painful.

Around a month ago, I had another sad dream. I dreamed that my best friend Alicia drowned. I found out by hearing about a girl who drowned in her parents pool. I heard the addresses and knew it was one of their family but, with 7 girls, I didn't know which. My mom called and told me Alicia had drowned, I didn't believe her. I thought it was some sort of cruel joke. Then, I saw newspapers, magazines, etc. with the story, and finally, I saw two of her sisters, at a movie theatre of all places, and once they saw me, they came and hugged me and fell apart. They told me she had headed out for school through the back door, tripped on something, and fell in the pool and under the pools cover. She had her school books on and must have been really tired, and for some reason didn't take them off. Plus, even if she got to the top of the pool, it would be really hard to get the cover out of the way so she could breathe....thus, she drowned.

I really wish I knew why I have such creep and disturbing dreams. I could tell you about the re-occuring vampire/grand canyon/lava dream I had as a kid, or the dreams my sister and I could fly if we just jumped of our white dresser and out the window, or the dream of the "end times" where these weird man eating creatures chased us and our only safety was staying on roof tops, or the dreams of kidnapping a child in a precarious situation, and fleeing the country with it. When I dream, I almost ALWAYS remember than in great detail. I know I dream a lot and don't remember too though, because sometimes I will wake up thinking about something odd, or wondering where I am. I find dreams fascinating and weird.